The last couple of weeks I have BEcome aware of the fact that each time I AM in a space of joy and happiness, regardless of what I may BE doing, I have noticed that I will hum a particular melody. When I BEcome aware that I AM humming it, it stops. If I mentally try to recapture the melody, I cannot remember it.
This happened again a couple of nights ago. I joined a group of like-minds in a sacred circle, all of us just sharing and vibing together for a couple of hours. When I left for the night, as I was driving down the highway heading home, basking in the glow of this incredible uplifting feeling, I BEcame aware that I was once again humming this melody. Once again, once I focused completely on it, it stopped. And once again, I could not re-create it once it stopped.
I BElieve when I AM connecting with my joy and bliss, my soul essence brings forth a melody. My soul melody. My heart is just overflowing with LOVE.
I had an experience yesterday that had me contemplating about the fear experienced when given the opportunity to express our authentic Self. Why standing in our truth brings up so much fear of how we will BE received by others? The more we can accept ourselves as the Divine BEings we are and step more and more into our authentic Self, the more freedom we experience. Why? Because we awaken to the truth that we are enough just as we are. We are people pleasers and over givers because we are seeking Love and acceptance outside of ourselves. When we go within and get in touch with our inner BEing, we discover we are Love, so we do not have to search for it, we are IT, and our reality will reflect that – as within, so without.
When I was speaking with someone yesterday and they were sharing a situation that had happened with them, they said they did not know how to handle the situation. When I suggested they just express their truth, say what it is that they are really feeling, they seemed appalled. When someone else suggested a different choice of not BEing completely honest, they grasped at it like it was a life line and seemed relieved. I don’t stand in judgement, I AM simply an observer of the human dynamic. When we are able to stand in our own truth we hold the space for others to stand in theirs and begin to heal. This is not something that happens overnight, it is a gradual process. Lets BE gentle with ourselves and others as we move through this process. We are ever evolving and embracing the true light of our Soul.
The month of July was one of BEing in deep inner connection. There was no where else to go but inward as July had the feeling of BEing in a void. I can only describe it as not feeling connected to anything external, nothing to “latch” on to, so to speak. That left me no choice other then to go within and connect with my inner BEing (my soul) who I had to trust was leading me to where I needed to BE. This can be a scary feeling, as the way I use to handle these feelings no longer worked. It was as though everything I tried to do was blocked. All around me I kept seeing and hearing the word surrender. Well as stubborn as I can BE, even I had to finally do just that, surrender. Let go and let God. Apparently my soul had other plans for me other then the ones I was trying to externally make happen. Okay, okay soul, I hear you.
I have to admit when I finally let go and stopped trying to push against what felt like an invisible brick wall, I experienced such a profound sense of peace. My frustration was gone. BEing in the void feels like BEing in a row boat in the middle of the night, with no oars to steer, but trusting the flow of water (my inner compass) taking me to a place of the unknown. What! Not know what is coming next! That feeling I have noticed seems to send most people into pure panic mode. And I admit though I was not panicking, I was feeling some anxiety. But once I finally listened to the guidance I was receiving to just surrender, as I said before, peace. Don’t get me wrong, in the month of July I was BEing in a space of creativity with my drawings, connecting with nature, doing things that spoke to my heart.
So here I AM in this moment in time and feeling that things are shifting. I AM facing the unknown head on, and instead of feeling anxiety, I feel excited. I AM just going to hang on for the ride!
This “theme” has been coming up for me lately. I have been reflecting on this a lot. I have always loved to help others. It gives me great joy to be of service. But one of the things I have been reflecting on is how much giving is too much. I AM sure we all know people in our life that seem to need a bit more “help” then others. They look to us for advice or assistance in one form or another. And though I feel part of my purpose in life is to support and guide others, I realize there are two sides to every coin. Even with support and guidance the other person or persons will still have to participate in their own life. They have a personal responsibility to themselves.
When the “role” we take on of support and guidance begins to cross that fine line into constant care taking and problem fixing, we then have to ask the question, are we really still helping? The truth is our choices create our reality. So what reality are we creating when we take someone else’s reality and make it our own? No one wants to see anyone suffer or struggle, but just like a caterpillars transformation into a butterfly, sometimes the struggle is in fact necessary for their own transformation.
We are here on earth for the chance to experience the growth of our soul. What a beautiful and empowering gift to give to another then for them to discover their own majestic BEing! I can’t speak for anyone else but how can I know what is best for anyone else, when I AM still discovering what is best for me?
We are co-creators of our own reality. The question is whether we are creating our life consciously or unconsciously. Do we go deep within our heart to gain true clarity about what we wish to create? Or do we just plow through life, feeling that life is happening to us? Or do we do our inner work and begin to claim our own power? In order to discover our beauty within, we have to stop worrying about what is going on externally and bring our focus internally. What does that mean? Stillness. In order for us to get to know our own beauty, we have to sit with ourself. At first the stirrings may be faint, but believe me they are there and they want to be heard.
It is easy to point fingers and blame others for what is taking place in our life, but I for one no longer wish to hand my power over to others. I AM choosing to recognize the beauty within my own soul, the power of my own dreams. I AM choosing to live my life for me and not the life that others see me living. Most people would call that selfish, but it is not selfish, it is self love. How can you give to others what you are not feeling inside? After all, we are spiritual beings having a human experience and I personally don’t want someone else directing my experience. Do you?
There seems to be a feeling of excitement in the air. Spring is just around the corner and with that comes a time for new beginnings. A time to look at all in our lives and decide if there are places where change is long over due. Perhaps a new job, a new love or just a change in the way we do things just to give us a fresh outlook. Change does not come easy to some, this I know from experience. But what change does is create “space” in our life for new and wonderful things to show up. Change does not always mean external things. Change can mean that we need to search inward and be very honest with ourselves about what is no longer working for us. Get clear about what we would like to see shift in our lives and then work on making that happen.
With so many external distractions happening around us, we need to take time to just be still. Stillness makes some people uncomfortable. Without our phones, television or computers we feel that we may miss something. But really what all those things do when we are unable to remove ourselves from them from time to time, is keep us from empowering ourselves with our true knowledge. The knowledge of the soul. You see, all the answers we will ever need we already have inside of us. Take a moment and think about that. Who knows you better than you?
A little food for thought.